Stupid Pet Tricks and Other Annoying Things Models and Actors Do!

Hi, I’m Joey. I’ve been in this business since god was young. Casting? That’s what I do. I didn’t want to do this writing thing, but the guy that owns this rag I’ve known for years, in fact I cast him first in a commercial when he was just little. I’ve seen this guy grow in the business and was disappointed when he left for so many years. Now he’s back, and you’ve heard the saying, “make a silk purse out of a sows ear”, this is the guy that does it. When he got out on his own, he made things happen and most of the time on a shoestring, he had the cars, the house, the girls, shit, he had it all. You’ve seen the lines to get into popular clubs, he never waited. And you know why, because he listened, and he read the fine print and he worked hard. He never let anyone pull the F**kin’ wool over his eyes. But he was also humble and would give you the shirt off his back. So if you got a chance to work with him, DO IT. Not only cause I like the little f**ker, but because he usually wins.

Okay, so enough about this prick. Let’s talk about me. I’ve been in the casting business for about 50 years. I agreed to write this if I could stay an enigma, a ghost, the spectral image in your f**kin’ nightmares. I might be a man or I might be a woman, just think of me as Pat, you know, the non-gender specific character on Saturday Night Live, that’s SNL for you idiots, only I got f**kin’ attitude and intelligence. And I’ve seen everything, so my writings will be about my life experiences and if you are not completely stupid you will learn something.

So, here’s a short piece about KC the publisher and a model. He tells me about all of the emails he gets from people who want to be featured in this magazine. Just the other day he sends me an email about a model who wanted to be featured, she replied to a casting call he put out. He sent her an email back, saying where a link was and how to submit for the casting along with a sheet with guidelines. Then she sent him a note back asking if this was a magazine, could she and friends and family see the images. HELLO?!? Lady are you just f**kin’ stupid or what? Can you not f**kin’ read or are you tweaker HO? I read these emails, mostly one liners, not rocket science. This woman had the looks, but the brains of a godd**n T-Rex.

People, read the shit that’s given to you, there is nothing more f**kin’ annoying than people who want a part, are given instructions and DO NOT read them or do then don’t follow through, and use the excuse, “I forgot, or I didn’t know I was supposed too”. This is why you don’t make it, cause most of you are idiots, lazy and don’t listen. For every one of you, there are at a minimum 100 more who want what you want. If you aren’t on top of your game, you lose. Get a f**kin’ clue.

If I decide to this again next month, it will be on, Working with Agents or Arrogant Pricks in the Business.