So You Think YOU Got It BAD L

By: Joey M

So you think you got it bad, and you stupid schmucks probably do. If you want to make it better I'll show you how. If you don't wanna learn, then piss off you're on your own.

I am directing this particularly at models, but it can apply to all of you other low life no talent f*#k-heads as well. I’ve been in this business a long, long time; and I worked with more A Lister’s than you will ever get close too. So F*#kin’ pay attention, this is for your own good.

Over the past few years, when we are searching for a particular look, from time to time, we checked out modeling web sites. We found a few that may have had what we are looking for and offered to do an interview and test shoot. 99.9% of the f*#kin’ time the model asks how much are they getting paid. Do you know what we tell them? NOT A F*#KIN’ DIME! YOU LOUSY WHORE! AND WE DON’T WANNA TALK TO YOUR STINKIN’ WANNA BE EGO MANIAC MANAGER WHO’S TRYIN’ TO PIMP YOU OUT ALONG WITH THE REST OF HIS STABLE OF NO TALENT IDIOT WHORES!

When a client calls Ford or Elite and the agent calls the models for a casting, do you think the models ask how much they are getting paid? No you know-nothings. They are going to a casting, probably a test shoot and callbacks. Then one of the lucky ones will get the job and get paid.

When you watch popular talk shows or popular interviews with popular people, DO YOU HONESTLY THINK THEY GET PAID FOR THEIR APPEARANCES! WELL DO YA! HELL NO! The popular people on popular shows or publications for that matter do it for the press, the exposure; that means more people will see them, for you idiots. The popular people’s name is their business. This exposure is advertising. It’s even more important to get exposure now with the economy suckin’ the way it does and even more important because of the internet. Why the internet you silly little empty-heads ask? Now listen closely or you will miss it, which won’t be hard for you wannabes. EVERYTIME and I mean every time your name is used in an article, a video, a title, anywhere online, it improves search rankings for you name, your brand, and you move up in rank. What does that mean for you, greater exposure! So your brand (You) have a bigger chance of being seen, being discovered or selling your skills and talent, if you have any. Tyra Banks is the name of the model, but it is also her brand.

If any good photographer asks you to do a shoot and you ask him how much he’s gonna pay you, don’t expect a callback. Good photographers DON’T pay models. If a photographers tells you he is going to pay you for nudie shots, to build his or her port; RUN! They just want to get in your pants or for some other perverted reason. How many of you have been flown from PoDunk, Iowa to Miami or L.A. for a nudie shoot, you end up going out partying, getting’ laid or worse and never get any work from the wannabe schmuck photographer again? He just paid you to be a whore and he got some pics to show to his buddies and beat his pud to. There are lots of you. Now of course there are exceptions to this. A student photographer may have to pay talent to do specific shoots, but this is extremely rare, there are plenty of models to go around, and a student is never gonna fly you anywhere. Or a GOOD to GREAT photographer, may offer to do a revenue share or pay a minimal amount for a personal project, such as calendar, gallery project or stock photos. Or a GOOD to GREAT photographer may have a budget from a client that allows for talent, but usually the client has their own talent, and if you are good and follow good guidance that talent could be you. Also, a GOOD to GREAT photographer is not gonna fly little ol’ you across the country for a shoot and pay you for it. Unless your name is Kate, Adriana or Gisele, the only person that’s gonna fly you anywhere is a perv or a porn photographer or porn producer.

So stop pimpin’ yourselves out. Stop blaming the modeling sites for lack of work. You have to learn how to properly network with people who can make a difference. You have to learn that building connections, and I mean F*#kin’ GOOD professional connections can make a tremendous difference in your lousy careers’.

A Good photographer has connections. A Good photographer or for that matter producer, publisher, manager or agent is basically in the same business you are, which is, the talent/entertainment industry. These people make their living from clients who pay big bucks for their knowledge, skills, connections, which is their talent, and access to talent (YOU). Do you honestly believe that they are going to pay you, unless it is something they are going to make a lot of money from? Get your head outta your ASS and smell the f*#kin’ coffee.

Getting good at what you do, understanding the business and knowing people who know the right people are, knowing how to work with multiple people, knowing how to market you, is where it’s at. How many of you have multiple talents? Are you getting exposure in a broad range of categories? How many of you stupid wannabe models have a photographer/manager who forbids you to shoot with someone else unless they pay you? DON”T BE F*#KIN’ IDIOTS! You have to INVEST in yourself. That investment can be time or money or both. But don’t expect to get paid until you are someone and have paid the dues and are working for a client. Don’t expect to get paid just for showing up. Don’t expect to get paid by someone who can help you advance your career. You are a business, your name as a talent is the brand. You have to market that brand just like McDonalds advertises hamburgers, they pay for the advertising to sell the hamburgers. GET IT?

If you still like the partying and attention from all the pervs, and gettin’ paid like a whore, get in the PORN business, because you are part of the worlds oldest profession, so stay away from me. You’ll die by the time you’re 35 from STD’s or a Crack induced heart attack. Good Luck with your short lousy life.

Hope you learned something.

Joey

By Jose (Joey)

Joey is a frequently published entertainment author, as well as over 30 years in the entertainment and film business. Joey's big gig has been and is, the casting and acquistion for talent for major clients in the film and fashion industries. Joey says don't look for me, this is my Pen Name.